Monday, May 9, 2011

Surprising Fictional Truths

Should you ever find yourself caught in some dire apocalyptic situation and no action-y guys are on speed dial, here are some key things to keep in mind.

Little Gun, Big Contender
In the event that you should have one on hand, always remember that a snub nose revolver will have the aiming capability and range of a sniper rifle. Keep one on you at all times for those instances when your foe is at a long distance from you.

Aliens Deal in Absolutes
Our neighbors in outer space are here for certain reasons: to save the world, mooch off our planet, or both. They never stop by to curiously check things out or buy a condo in, say, Ft. Lauderdale. No, for some reason we're either endearing to the entire universe or we have really ticked someone off.

Nukes Will Fix Anything
A nice little blast from a well aimed nuclear bomb is a great tool for any need you might have. If the sun gets tired, take a shot at it. If the core for some reason stopped spinning, a nuke can get it going again, no trouble at all. If a large space object has somehow completely ignored the laws of physics and is on its way to take us out, just get yourself a nuke and a few rednecks and you're good.

Bach Will Save the World
If the aliens mentioned earlier stop by and they're a little annoyed/care way too much about the frogs and trees, play some Bach. It'll win them over real fast.

So there you go. Just a few tips to remember, good for any situation.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

The Viewpoint

When I took the picture of this tucked away little piece of Americana pie, I think my brain exploded with the sheer potential. Seriously, I can only think of one other thing to do with this image, and that's classified information.

But here's a little exercise for you. Make a short story or a scene about the Viewpoint restaurant. Even if it has nothing whatsoever to do with your book, write a short piece with a few people.

In reality, the Viewpoint is located up near Fontana Lake and Fontana Dam in Western North Carolina. It's old. It's a little forgotten. Sometime recently, it was still open, because the colors are still incredibly bright. But at some point, a small piece of the world changed and travelers began to turn the other cheek as they passed, hurrying on up the road to a landmark or an attraction or something else much more important, somewhere generic enough to make it on Facebook. The real, raw, forgotten beauty in the world takes its time, always waiting for you to come back to it, infinitely patient until wind and rain and time gently pulls it back into the earth, leaving only an imprint behind to make you wonder what could possibly make you feel so at home when you've never been there before.

When you write a novel, one of the best things to do is latch on to that feeling, however you can. Novels are our own little universes. When you feel at home with your novel, that's when you're on to something. It won't be perfect in the first go, but that's okay. It's still coming from you, and no one else. Without that, it's really completely nothing.